If I Could Wave My Magic Wand

I had a dream I was swimming in open water, way out at sea. It was so deep, I could never reach bottom. You said you'd meet me there, a midnight rendezvous you called it! We spoke briefly of our essential constituents, nothing really more than just elemental star dust. But now I'm beginning to suspect that I have been a fool for you, that I was nothing but a fool for you.

I'm not one to believe in magic
But I sometimes have a second-sight
I'm not one with a sense of proportion
When my heart still changes overnight. Lyrics by RUSH

Red Lenses

Sir! Sir! You there! You were standing here when all of this went down! Tell us what happened! Well, I was standin' over there by the tomaters! Suddenly this dang ol' fool walks in and says that the mercury is rising and somethin' about a pair of dancin' shoes, the soviets are the blues. Well sir, I just seen Red!

I see red
and it hurts my head
guess it must be something
that I read. Lyrics by RUSH.

The Body Electric

I awake to the sound of a large truck pulling up along side the house. Outside the bedroom window, the thing is inching straight up to my house so that the driver and I are eye to eye. I can see that it is a milk tanker and realize that the guy has missed his destination by one block. Through the window I begin motioning to the driver that he needs to go a block over. He starts trying to back out, so I decide to get out there to help him. I emerge to find the driver laying under the trailer with a remote control devise that allows him to move his truck. Everything is proceeding nicely when suddenly I see that the trailer is slowly backing into a power pole. I began to yell for the guy to stop, but the pole began to bend down under the weight of the still moving truck. I looked up to see high tension wires coming down on top of me, but I was paralyzed and could not move. I began screaming for him to stop, the wires only inches away from my chest, I awoke again, gasping for breath.
Memory banks unloading
Bytes break into bits
Unit One's in trouble and it's scared out of its wits. lyrics by RUSH

High Water

Shortly after entering the old hut, I laid down for a nap. I went instantly into a lucid dream. Waters were rising in the darkness, amidst an endless flood. They flowed into my memory, they flowed into my blood. I watched as something broke the surface and stared up at the starry dome. I still feel that relation, when the water takes me home. In the flying spray of the ocean, the water takes me home.

Springing from the weight of the mountains
Like the heart of the earth would burst
Flowing out from marble fountains
In the dreams of a desert thirst. lyrics by RUSH

Totem

Finally, after hours of hacking through dense under growth, we broke out of the woods. I could hear the sound of waves crashing on the shore. Once again, my father's orienteering skills were impeccable, we were only a few hundred yards away from old Keetah's hut. I remembered hearing the old man once say that here, every bird and fish knew it's course and that every tree had it's own place upon this earth, but that man alone had lost his way. Well, maybe figuratively speaking.

I believe in what I see
I believe in what I hear
I believe that what I'm feeling
Changes how the world appears. Rush Totem lyrics.

You'll Ruin Your New Shoes!

Dang! I seem to be a magnet for road debris out there on my new tires. I have already had a pinch flat (at 100 psi?) and tonight as I was rollin' back in on Placer, a puncture that I thought was caused by a small piece of glass (sticking in the sidewall) but turned out to be a needle-like nail. Problem is it's all happened to the rear tire. My peer group told me to get the folding tires even though I had put 2 seasons on the same tire with a wire bead and loved them. The new ones are extremely supple and sweet, but are they less flat resistant?

The Final Farewell

We arrived at the front door of the cabin and yelled for Ted. Finally my dad had waited long enough, he opened it himself. There, pinned to a chair was a note with the words "To whom it may concern; Every now and then when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas ... with the music at top volume and at least a pint of ether, or in my case Red Bluff to Montana.” We never saw old Ted again (in person) but when "they" finally caught up to him, he had definitely had his hand (and a few others) in the making of history.

Freeze; Part Four of FEAR

The saffron-robed monk known as Bhakti, escorted us the final mile into Ted's place talking the entire way. "So I say's to the guy, I say's, so you're dying, but look how many problems you're saving. At least with what's going on in the world today, you should thank God that you're going out!” Turns out that Bhakti was born Harvey Strassman, a Jew, from the Bronx of New York. My father was trying to ask him questions about Ted, but Bhakti just kept on blabbering. "Hey, What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish women?" My dad was getting frustrated now but politely re-asked the question back to Bhakti. "I don't know Bhakti, What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish women?" "Is ANYTHING all right?" He yelled laughing, falling to the ground, completely useless for the rest of the day.

Happy Easter!

Run For The Hills

Since it was Friday just prior to Spring break, the school officials decided to release me to my father's custody. They smiled nervously, if not politely, as we left the office building, adding their best wishes for a Happy Easter, see you in 10 days. On our way home I asked my dad how in the world those old stuffed shirts could have changed their tune so quickly and who was the man he had mentioned to them as being his attorney. He told me that he was one of his friend's back in L.A. and not to worry about it any more. He then told me that what was important was that we get out to Ted's cabin immediately because he thought there might be a few "visitors" heading out that way.

Witch Hunt; Part Three of FEAR

The night is black
Without a moon
The air is thick and still
The vigilantes gather on
The lonely torch lit hill

Features distorted in the flickering light
The faces are twisted and grotesque
Silent and stern in the sweltering night
The mob moves like demons possessed
Quiet in conscience, calm in their right
Confident their ways are best

The righteous rise
With burning eyes
Of hatred and ill-will
Madmen fed on fear and lies
To beat and burn and kill

They say there are strangers who threaten us
In our immigrants and infidels
They say there is strangeness too dangerous
In our theaters and bookstore shelves
That those who know what's best for us
Must rise and save us from ourselves

Quick to judge
Quick to anger
Slow to understand
Ignorance and prejudice
And fear walk hand in hand...


lyrics by RUSH

The Truth Is Out There; Part Two of FEAR

I squinted in an effort to see beyond the blinding spotlight of the interrogation room. Who were these people and how many of them were in there? I repeated my statement. "I'm telling you the truth, my dad knows a man named Ted who lives in the Yollo Bolly Wilderness, in a cabin he built! He has a ton of books!" I pleaded. Just then over the intercom I heard a voice say, "Mr. H. There is a Mr. Seely here to see you." "Send him in!" He said. I continued my story. "This guy Ted says he used to be a professor at Berkley, he says he's going to re-write history!" I proudly announced. "That is the end of the interview!" My father said, as he entered the room.

Red Bluff 1972; Part one of FEAR

When I was in tenth grade at Red Bluff Union High School, my class was given the dreaded book report assignment. I decided that if I were to find a book that I thought no one (namely my teacher) had ever read, I could B.S. my way through and hopefully, get my famous C- grade. I selected this little book and wrote my heavily plagiarized report. Upon returning to class the day after handing in the assignment, I was met at the door by my teacher and the boy's V.P. I was told to accompany Mr. H to the office for a little talk. He took me to a room in the administrations building and there I discovered what appeared to be an interrogation room. I was informed that my father had been contacted and that I was to cooperate with the investigation or be expelled from school. All they wanted to know was, "Where did you get the book and where is it now?"

I Got Owned!

They say that one man's easy, century-recovery-ride is another man's butt-kicking, longest-ride-of-the-season, survival-fest. This certainly was the case yesterday, when I rode to Red Bluff and back with Mr. Souphouse, aka Stanley to my Ollie. The fact that he was on his Cyclocross bike and I was on my "Fast Bike" didn't help matters of ego much either. I am here today to debunk the myth that Cyclocross training and Mt. Bike riding are good ways to get ready for Road Season. I would say it's the other way 'round. Regular 50-100 mile road rides is how you get ready for Road Season!

Raised By Wolves

Blessing of the Bikes... and burgers

Please join us this April for the annual Blessing of the Bikes out at Father Herman's Church in beautiful Uptown Platina. Burgers after the show.

Easter Radishes

If you happen to stumble upon any of these little beauties in your organic vegetable shopping rounds, grab a bunch for me as well as yourself! They are mighty tasty!

More My Speed

Yes my friends, that is a V.W. bus out on the salt flats. Mid-engine, 500 cubic inch big block V8. It pretty much stays out of the way of anything coming up from behind!

Coming To A city Near You!

Celebrating its 100th anniversary, Oregon-based Tillamook Cheese shut the dairy farm gates behind it and hit the open road Jan. 9 on The Loaf Love Tour, making its first stop in Tucson, AZ, then nine other states and 25 cities over 11 months. At the center of the tour is a fleet of Loaf Love Buses: 1967 Volkswagen buses shortened by four feet, lowered by one foot and refurbished as replicas of Tillamook’s baby cheddar cheese loaves. Thanks and a tip o' the hat to Jacquie Phelan.

My Boyhood Hero

The Rifleman's Rifle. The trick feature of the rifle was a screw pin attached to the large loop lever which was positioned so as to trip the trigger when the ring was slammed home, thus allowing Lucas to rapid-fire the rifle, similarly to a semi-automatic rifle. The trigger trip screw pin was also used in two configurations. Sometimes McCain had the screw head turned inside close to the trigger. Most of the times he had it on the outside of the trigger guard with a lock nut on the outside to further secure its position. In some of the episodes the screw was taken out completely when rapid fire action was not needed. When properly adjusted, this screw “squeezed” the trigger when the lever was fully closed.

So Long and Thanks For All the Fish!

I'm off to the cloisters for a weekend sabbatical in preparation for Palm Sunday See Ya'll at Bechelli North for Cyclocross this Sunday.

Some Folks Calls It A Vapour Trail...

I call it a contrail. As a wing generates lift, it causes a vortex to form at each wingtip, and sometimes also at the tip of each wing flap. These wingtip vortices persist in the atmosphere long after the aircraft has passed. The reduction in pressure and temperature across each vortex can cause water to condense and make the cores of the wingtip vortices visible. This effect is more common on humid days. Wingtip vortices can sometimes be seen behind the wing flaps of airliners during takeoff and landing, and during landing of the Space shuttle. Any persisting rumors of contrails forming behind a certain, local, 6 foot 5 inch, single-speed rider on downhill sections, is merely conjecture.

Hot Stuff!

Pert near took my head clean off last night with a little home-made cold remedy my buddy made. Comprised of cayenne, ginger, hot water and honey, this little concoction will cure what ails ya!

Seems To Me It's Chemistry

Signal transmitted
Message received
Reaction making impact
Invisibly

Elemental telepathy
Exchange of energy
Reaction making contact
Mysteriously

Eye to I
Reaction burning hotter
Two to one
Reflection on the water
H to O
No flow without the other
Oh but how
Do they make contact
With one another?

Electricity? Biology?
Seems to me it's Chemistry

Emotion transmitted
Emotion received
Music in the abstract
Positively

Elemental empathy
A change of synergy
Music making contact
Naturally

One, two, three
Add without subtraction
Sound on sound
Multiplied reaction
H to O
No flow without the other
Oh, but how
Do we make contact
With one another?

Off the album, Signals by Rush.

Webfoot Finale

Wow, I was not expecting a turn out like that! Even with the time change, we ended up with our biggest and best ride yet! I want to thank all who attended our season closer and remind you to stay tuned for next years "Rolling Party" schedule. Until then keep the rubber side down and the muddy-side up!

Burning Dan and Tea Fairy

Firedrums is coming up soon and by golly, this year promises to be bigger and better than ever. I am planning on riding my unicycle over Hwy 36, juggling all the way. My friend Zuma called last night and said he has built a tree house that rivals the Swiss Family Robinson's and I am to be comp'd my entry fees! Oh. oh, oh, it's magic!

Say Good Bye To Your Only Friend...

at least for awhile that is. You see we are all in for a rude awakening come next Monday morning when we begin our days, in total darkness. Stupid Daylight Saving Time kicks in early Sunday morning. Since we are planning a final Webfoot ride this Sunday (Thanks Brooke) I am planing on a 10 a.m. departure time. That way it will feel like 9 a.m. Unfortunately, the real world won't be so accommodating. Sunday Mar. 14th, 10 a.m. Daylight Saving Time. Webfoot. Be there!

WOMBATS

I have included a link to my ol' pal Jacquie Phelan's blog for yall check out. Jacquie was introduced to me back in the 80's, by a guy who was on Gary Fisher's original Mt. Bike Team, Peter Lewendal. Jacquie founded an organization (after her years as women's world champion) called WOMBATS. Women Of Mt. Biking And Tea Society. Occasionally they allow a token man to join. I really don't think I could keep up with them. But it would be fun to try!

Nice Touch!

You know, I'm still blown away by the way old Jack W. was able to ride his way up through the pack during the "B" race on Sunday. But when those girls came out after the race and pushed his bike back to the truck... Good show old Chap!

Turtle Bay Sneak Peek

Spy cameras have captured images of a certain Red Bluff man's secret weapon for the upcoming Turtle Bay race in 2 weeks. Rumors persist that he is filling the bike's frame tubes and tires with helium. And there may be more in his innocent looking banana bread than just bananas. Race officials are considering a 20 lb additional weight requirement for this madman in the form of a large bag of dog food strapped to his back. Crikey, he'd still hand it to us!

Amelia Earhart FOUND!

A rumor which claimed that Earhart had made propaganda radio broadcasts as one of the many women compelled to serve as Tokyo Rose was investigated closely by Jim Blevins. According to several biographies of Earhart, Blev investigated this rumor personally but after listening to many recordings of numerous Tokyo Roses he did not recognize her voice among them. Well after 50 years of being moth-balled, David Seely has evidence of the contrary! As you can see by the clock on the wall, this photo was taken late in the evening (for old farts!) and Amelia was allegedly well into her cups.

Big Money

Big money goes around the world
Big money underground
Big money got a mighty voice
Big money make no sound
Big money pull a million strings
Big money hold the prize
Big money weave a mighty web
Big money draw the flies

Sometimes pushing people around
Sometimes pulling out the rug
Sometimes pushing all the buttons
Sometimes pulling out the plug
It's the power and the glory
It's a war in paradise
It's a Cinderella story
On a tumble of the dice

Big money goes around the world
Big money take a cruise
Big money leave a mighty wake
Big money leave a bruise
Big money make a million dreams
Big money spin big deals
Big money make a mighty head
Big money spin big wheels

Sometimes building ivory towers
Sometimes knocking castles down
Sometimes building you a stairway
Lock you underground
It's that old time religion
It's the kingdom they would rule
It's the fool on television
Getting paid to play the fool

Big money goes around the world
Big money give and take
Big money done a power of good
Big money make mistakes
Big money got a heavy hand
Big money take control
Big money got a mean streak
Big money got no soul... Rush from their album Power Windows

Roll The Bones

Peart (1991): "The song Roll the Bones is full of any number of little decisions that I had to make about what I thought, and how best to express them and how to introduce the idea that yes we do have free will and yes we do have choices, and yes our choices do affect the way our fates turn out. But at the same time, there are always these wild cards that are going to come along, sometimes tragically, sometimes triumphantly. The motto comes down to 'Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst'."

Geek Culture And The Joy Of Tech

Here's a fun little link to explore. Not a lot about bicycles but still cool. geekculture.com And speaking of JEOPARDY, I saw a clue the other night that was kind o' disturbing. "Known as, H.F.C.S. in the food industry, the average American consumes 40 pounds of it a year." What is High Fructose Corn Syrup! Yuk!

Occam's Razor

Occam's razor (or Ockham's razor), entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem, is the principle that "entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity" and the conclusion thereof, that the simplest explanation or strategy tends to be the best one. The principle is attributed to 14th-century English logician, theologian and Franciscan friar, William of Ockham. I've been hearing a fair amount of buzz regarding a return to the olden days of shaving. It is with this principal in mind that I offer my opinion regarding the matter. Have a nice shave!

Meanwhile, Back On Earth

According to my solstice monolith, everything is right on track for yet another spring here on planet Earth. The first kittens of the new year are emerging like blind kielbasas, paddling alongside their litter mates in makeshift cardboard nests, searching for the eternal milk-teat- goddess. Milk that miracle. What an ingenious way of nourishing one's young. Yet the birds have managed to pull it off without a drop of the stuff. Go configure!

Corporatization of Higher Ed-U-Ma-Cashun

Just about everyone with a stake in the long-term success of U.S. higher education worries about the growing influence of free-market business practices on the operation of colleges and universities. Most faculty, in particular, see the increasing reliance on corporate models as destructive the mission of higher education. Surprisingly, however, faculty members have not yet acted together through professional associations such as the AAUP to take an informed and persuasive position condemning the influence of corporatization on higher education. Nor have they suggested a reasonable approach to resist and reduce its spread. Resistance is futile! We are Borg!

Hammer Time

Well Folks, by my estimation, we should be hearing any day now of the comet that is heading toward us on a collision course for the year 2012. Regrets? I've had a few but
then again, too few to mention. It's been a full life and I have been extremely fortunate to have such wonderful friends and family. Now, the best we can hope for is that we are somewhere near ground zero when she comes on in. That would be quick!

One Lump or Two?

I was sitting at home watching a show about a nano-diamond discovery that indicates that North America was hit by a swarm of comets some 13,000 years ago. That corresponds to the beginning of the Younger Dryas period, a 1,300-year-long cold spell, during which North American mammoths, saber-toothed cats, camels and giant sloths became extinct. The Clovis culture of American Indians also appears to have fallen apart during this time. Suddenly, a small rap upon my door rang out and behold! My special tea connection arrived! I cannot tell ya'll the absolute miracle of flavors this man has brought to my life!

Happy Belated Pancake Day!

Pancake Day
Main article: Shrove Tuesday

In Canada, the United Kingdom, Ireland, and Australia, pancakes are traditionally eaten on Shrove Tuesday, which is also known as "Pancake Day" and, particularly in Ireland, as "Pancake Tuesday". (Shrove Tuesday is better known in the United States, France and other countries as Mardi Gras or Fat Tuesday). Historically, pancakes were made on Shrove Tuesday so that the last of the fatty and rich foods could be used up before Lent.

Perfect Day!

Prime Mover

P => Power

E => Energy

W => Work

f => Force

t => torque

d => distance of translational motion

q => angle of rotational motion (in radians)

v => velocity of translational motion

w => angular speed (in radians per second)

d => change

Pd => Pitch diameter

n => number of teeth on a gear

nrev => number of revolutions

How to make The Breakfast of CHAMPIONS!

Ingredients

* 2 slices whole grain bread
* 3 eggs
* 1 Tbls. water
* 1/2 a tomato
* 1/2 an onion
* 2 pieces of soysage sliced
* 1 tablespoon crumbled feta cheese
* 1/2 an avocado
* 1 teaspoon olive oil
* 1 teaspoon mixed herbs
* salt and pepper

Manly Men, Working To Build A Better Tomorrow!

Now this is more like it! As the result of my last blog entries, blurring of concise borders, I have decided to devote the entire month of March to a Men-At-Work theme. I certainly hope everyone will sleep a little easier knowing that the Polyphosphate Filter will once again be a safe place for you and your kids to hang out at. Sorry for any inconvenience!

Come Ride With Us!

I got this rather unusual invitation from an old buddy whom I haven't seen since 1979. Apparently he has made several lifestyle changes through the years, not the least of which is playing rugby instead of American football. You see, he was our high school quarter back and he lead us to a division championship in 1974. Also apparently, the naked chaps on the bicycle, are participating in the one of the numerous initiation rituals they require to play for "Their Team." Fortunately, I have a full plate this weekend and won't be joining them, this season!

Miyata "Nine Twelve" Shake-Down Ride

Close but no cigar! My quest for an old steel framed road bike that will roll along as well as my Modern, "Soul-less" machine, is still unrealized. In the mean while, I've got another, decent road bike for sale. See me for details.

CycloCross Returns To Shasta Lake!

Although I am now happily resting on my CX laurels, I do want everyone to know about the Races at the Boom Town BMX track, this coming Sunday Feb. 21th. There will be a small, Giro-Insignifica ride, from Carpet Mart to the races Sunday. We shall leave here at 9 a.m. and ride mainly road up there, with a return over Flannigan to the Upper-Ditch to Hornbeck back. Retired CX-Bike friendly!

Little Chain-Ring Virgin

Well it took a bit o' coaxing but, I finally convinced a die-hard roadie (out on his new mt. bike) to use the little ring! Then I realized that I will never be able to keep up with him on long, technical climbs again. It all took place yesterday morning out on a Web-Foot ride. We had a blast! Don't forget to phone ahead for your Tyler Hamilton autographed postcard and riders manifesto! See you in the real world!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Saint Valentine (in Latin, Valentinus) is the name of several martyred saints of ancient Rome. The name "Valentine", derived from valens (worthy), was popular in Late Antiquity. Of the Saint Valentine whose feast is on February 14, nothing is known except his name and that he was buried at the Via Flaminia north of Rome on February 14. It is even uncertain whether the feast of that day celebrates only one saint or more saints of the same name. For this reason this liturgical commemoration was not kept in the Catholic calendar of saints for universal liturgical veneration as revised in 1969. But "Martyr Valentinus the Presbyter and those with him at Rome" remains in the list of saints proposed for veneration by all Catholics.

In the Eastern Orthodox Church, Saint Valentine the Presbyter is celebrated on July 6, and Hieromartyr Saint Valentine (Bishop of Interamna, Terni in Italy) is celebrated on July 30. Notwithstanding that, conventionally, members of the Greek Orthodox Church named Valentinos (male) or Valentina (female) celebrate their name on February 14, according to the Typikon of the Great Church of Christ (Τυπικὸν τῆς Μεγάλης τοῦ Χριστοῦ ᾽Εκκλησίας) Saint Valentine is not venerated not on July 6, nor on July 30. In fact, there exists no Saint Valentine in the Greek Orthodox Church.

Welcome to Cycling Camp 1963

I took this picture, when I was a wee lad, of me pals at cyclo-camp in the Yorkshire Dales of England. Such happy memories! We were huge fans of Brian Robinson in those days. There's young Thomas giving us his best impression of him!

My New Favorite

I am having fun piecing an old miyata bicycle together and learning about the Miyata Bicycle Company. Here's a little beauty I would love to load up with all my gear and pedal off into the sunset on! Cheers! Check out this cool Miyata Catalogs link.

Never Cry Werewolf

I am doing a bit o' research into Werewolf/Wolfman legends in anticipation of this Friday's release of the movie, The Wolfman. As a romantic mini-get-away, the little woman and I are planning on seeing it in the theater on Valentine's day. I am astonished by the volume of info there is on this particular subject. Not to mention the cinematic contributions.

Thoughts While Rididng

I was five minutes into the twelve minute climb when suddenly this happy little thought came to mind!